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2009-04-08 · Hank · watch on YouTube · Science & nature · explainer learning

Answering John's call for a time machine for the Evil Baby Orphanage, Hank explains relativistic time travel and a wormhole time machine that could never reach before its own creation.

What is said

00:00:15 — Hank takes John's Tuesday in exchange for two Tuesdays and John proofreading the first 150 pages of Hank's novel

  • ★★ Hank took John's Tuesday in exchange for John doing the next two Tuesdays and proofreading the first section of Hank's novel. — 00:00:16
  • ★★ Hank has just finished the first section of his novel, about 150 pages, which John, a New York Times bestselling author, will proofread. — 00:00:25 · The New York Times

00:00:37 — The brothers' Evil Baby Orphanage dispute: historical evil babies (John) vs an orphanage that already exists (Hank)

  • ★★ Hank says the brothers disagree on the orphanage as a story: John wants well-known evil babies like Stalin and Hitler, but then why does the world still suck? (playful) — 00:00:40 · Evil Baby Orphanage, Adolf Hitler
  • ★★ Hank prefers the idea that an Evil Baby Orphanage already exists and its overworked creator's best effort is the world we live in now. (playful) — 00:00:58 · Evil Baby Orphanage

00:01:11 — How to build John's time machine: grandfather paradox, missing time tourists, time dilation near light speed, a wormhole time machine that only reaches back to its creation

  • ★★★ Hank names the first problem with time travel: the grandfather paradox, which might unravel the universe and seems a loophole the universe wouldn't allow. (hedged) — 00:01:18
  • ★★ Hank's second problem: if time travel were possible, why don't we ever see time travellers? — 00:01:34
  • ★★★ Hank explains everyone travels forward in time at one second per second, and moving close to light speed makes your time pass more slowly relative to others. — 00:02:02
  • ★★ Hank says on a near-light-speed interstellar journey perhaps only a couple of years pass for the traveller while tens to thousands pass for the universe. (hedged) — 00:02:34
  • ★★★ Hank describes a wormhole time machine: create a wormhole (many say it is theoretically possible), move one end near light speed, stop it; entering, you come out dead or in the past. — 00:02:55
  • ★★★ Hank concludes such a machine could only take you back to the day it was built, so it cannot create the grandfather paradox. — 00:03:19

00:03:27 — So evil babies stay free; asks: other backwards time travel, John's side or Hank's; Song Wednesday tomorrow; DFTBA

  • ★★ For the orphanage, Hank says every day without a time machine is another day evil babies are free to do evil. (playful) — 00:03:27 · Evil Baby Orphanage
  • ★★ Hank asks viewers in comments for other ways to travel backwards in time, and whether they side with John or him: historical or non-historical evil babies. — 00:03:40 · Evil Baby Orphanage

Humor (significant)

  • Hank asks whether his videos have been boring lately and blames too few jump cuts; a stretch of (presumably) jump cuts follows. — 00:00:00 > «I just don't think that I do enough jump cuts anymore.»
  • Asking why time travellers never visit, Hank says where he would travel to in all of history. — 00:01:39 > «I'd want to come back to the dawn of the information age and watch the decline of television and the rise of YouTube!»
  • Hank points at the viewer and announces they are travelling forward in time at one second per second. — 00:02:02 > «Oh, I just blew my own mind!»
  • To go forward in time faster you just have to move really fast; Hank runs around. — 00:02:15 > «Unfortunately I don't think that that was fast enough and now I have a little bit of a headache.»

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