John and Rainn Wilson Talk Romance
2012-08-13 · John, Rainn Wilson · watch on YouTube · Everyday life · conversation qa
John puts Twitter followers' romance problems to Rainn Wilson, who advises that someone just dumped must feel and grieve the loss before moving on; after a comic detour into cysts and Rainn's drained scrotum, John recalls learning that a breakup hurts because it mattered.
What is said
00:00:00 — Monday video: John has talked to Rainn Wilson, like Ze Frank and Wheezy Waiter; a Twitter romance question: 'I just got dumped. What do?'
- ★★ John says that, like Ze Frank and Wheezy Waiter, he recently got to talk to Rainn Wilson, and he asked Twitter for romantic problems they could solve together. — 00:00:00 · Ze Frank, Craig Benzine, Twitter
- ★ The description says a nine-minute extended cut of the conversation is available on Hank's channel. — 00:00:00 · hankschannel
- ★ The description calls this a very special Monday talk that does not supersede John's Tuesday video. — 00:00:00
00:00:24 — Rainn's advice: feel the feelings; a breakup is a death with a grieving process to be processed before moving on
- ★★★ Rainn advises someone just dumped to feel the feelings first: a breakup is the death of a relationship, with a grieving process that must be fully processed. (hedged) — 00:00:24
- ★★ Rainn says people urge the dumped to get back out and have fun, but you can't really move on until you've felt the pain; then you can move on in many ways. — 00:00:24
00:00:58 — Detour: Rainn's scalp-cyst analogy, John's drained arm cyst, Rainn's drained scrotum (hydrocele) story
- ★★ Rainn likens moving on too early to a scalp cyst that was not fully removed: if the doctor doesn't get it all, it grows back. — 00:00:58
- ★ John says he recently had a cyst inside his arm drained by his doctor, who drained it into a cup to show him what was inside. (playful) — 00:00:58
- ★★ Rainn tells of having his scrotum drained for a hydrocele: one side swelled far larger, a syringe took about eight ounces, it refilled, and surgery removed a membrane. (playful) — 00:01:20
00:02:15 — Back to breakups: 'roll with it'; John dumped at 22 and told 'it hurts because it mattered'
- ★★★ John recalls being dumped at about 22 and devastated; when he asked why it hurt so much, someone he cared about told him it hurts because it mattered. — 00:02:15
- ★★★ John says this taught him that some things in life hurt because they were important, and, as Rainn says, a breakup is a real loss that needs to be grieved. — 00:02:49
00:02:49 — Thanks, SoulPancake plug and its new YouTube channel; 'YouTube channel pointers' giraffe-sex thumbnail joke
- ★★ John thanks Rainn and asks viewers to check out SoulPancake at soulpancake.com and on YouTube, welcoming it as an important voice on YouTube. — 00:02:49
- ★★ Rainn says SoulPancake talks about life's big questions and will explore them on its new YouTube channel. — 00:02:49
Humor (significant)
- John and Rainn compare where their cysts were and how they were drained — 00:01:20 > «This is, by the way, what old people talk about.»
- Rainn describes how much bigger one side of his swollen scrotum was than the other — 00:01:47 > «A golf ball and a baseball.»
- Having set out to give romantic advice, John reflects on where the conversation went — 00:02:15 > «the one thing that I was confident about is that we were not going to discuss scrotal swelling»
- Asked whether he has any YouTube channel pointers for SoulPancake's new channel — 00:02:49 > «the thing that's worked best for us is just to use giraffe sex as the thumbnail»
Threads in this video
- tell · John is dumped at about 22 and told it hurts because it mattered — John tells of being dumped at about 22 and being told it hurt because it mattered. (00:02:15)
- restate · Does suffering have meaning, or is it mostly unnecessary harm to be reduced? — John: some things in life hurt because they were important; a breakup is a real loss that needs to be grieved. (00:02:49)
- open · John asks viewers to check out SoulPancake and its new YouTube channel (2012) — John asks viewers to check out SoulPancake at soulpancake.com and its YouTube channel. (00:02:49)
- callback · John's giraffe-love bit ('people love giraffes who love giraffes') — Asked for YouTube channel pointers, John says what has worked best for the vlogbrothers is giraffe sex as the thumbnail. (00:02:49)
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