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Guys Love Giraffe Love

2008-05-21 · John · watch on YouTube · Nerdfighteria · conversation qa

In the first of two Question Tuesdays this week John answers viewer questions on books, Twilight, YouTube popularity (loyal, collaborative Nerdfighters; men watch only the giraffe-sex videos), last words and his marriage, and solves the Evil Baby Orphanage's time-travel premise.

What is said

00:00:00 — Question Tuesday opens: favourite band, Vonnegut and Morrison; In Dubious Battle and teenagers; Edward or Jacob

  • ★★ Asked for favourites, John names The Mountain Goats as his band, Mother Night as his favourite Vonnegut novel and Song of Solomon as his favourite Toni Morrison book. — 00:00:00 · The Mountain Goats
  • ★★★ Asked how In Dubious Battle relates to teenagers, John rejects the idea that readers must identify with characters to enjoy a book; it is about group psychology and the machine and its cogs. — 00:00:00
  • ★★★ John thinks we have to get past the idea that art is supposed to be merely pleasurable. (hedged) — 00:00:41
  • ★★ On Edward or Jacob, John calls Edward Cullen a beautiful but empty vessel for our hopes; people who are mostly ideas attract more, but loving one is not sustainable, so he picks Jacob. (playful) — 00:00:41 · Edward Cullen

00:01:10 — Key to YouTube popularity: loyal Nerdfighters, collaborative community, men watch only giraffe-sex videos; romantic last words (W. C. Fields)

  • ★★★ Asked the key to YouTube popularity, John says YouTube's new demographics feature shows Nerdfighters are extremely loyal, which he thinks is because nerdfighting is something they all do together. (hedged) — 00:01:10 · YouTube, Nerdfighteria, nerdfighter
  • ★★ John reports that 294 of the brothers' 296 videos have been watched by more women than men; the two exceptions have giraffe sex as the thumbnail. — 00:01:10 · Vlogbrothers, giraffe
  • ★ John asks the men of YouTube to explain in the comments what fascinates them about giraffes who love giraffes. (playful) — 00:01:10 · giraffe, YouTube
  • ★★★ John's advice: to become marginally popular on YouTube and help create a community you care about that is composed entirely of awesome, build a truly collaborative community. — 00:01:44 · YouTube
  • ★★ Asked for his last words, John says romantic last words are almost always lame; the only exception he knows, W. C. Fields's words to Carlotta, is spoiled because she was his mistress. — 00:01:44

00:02:13 — Two years married today; flowers from Hank and Katherine; jealous of Hank?; who the F is Hank

  • ★★ John says his last words would probably tell the Yeti he loves her; they have been married two years today, and he thanks Hank and Katherine for sustainably farmed flowers. — 00:02:13 · Sarah Urist Green, Hank Green, Katherine Green
  • ★★ Asked if he is jealous of Hank, John says no, although Hank has eight of their nine most viewed videos. (playful) — 00:02:13 · Hank Green
  • ★★ Answering 'Who the F is Hank?', John says Hank is a tiny yellow songbird said to represent the soul of France, with an undetermined role in the Omnictionary Project. (joke) — 00:02:13 · Who the Eff Is Hank, Hank Green

00:02:42 — Million dollars or punching Hitler: the time-machine Evil Baby Orphanage plan and its premise; sign-off with Paper Towns giveaway

  • ★★★ Choosing between a million dollars and punching Hitler, John would time-travel to put evil baby Hitler, Stalin, Idi Amin and others in the Evil Baby Orphanage in Tibet, then sell the time machine. (joke) — 00:02:42 · Evil Baby Orphanage, Adolf Hitler
  • ★★ If the time machine's buyer killed John first, a Schrödinger's cat situation would follow; John thinks this solves the Evil Baby Orphanage's relation to history and is their premise. (playful) (hedged) — 00:03:11 · Evil Baby Orphanage, Hank Green
  • ★★ John reminds viewers there is one more Question Tuesday this week and that he gives a Paper Towns copy to a random commenter every day; leave questions in comments. — 00:03:40 · Paper Towns, Question Tuesday

Humor (significant)

  • Asked his favourite band, John answers as if asked about rubber bands. — 00:00:00 > «I don't know, probably Rubber. Oh, wait, you mean like musical band.»
  • Only two of the brothers' 296 videos were watched by more men than women. — 00:01:10 > «The two exceptions? Both feature giraffe sex as the center screenshot.»
  • John answers the recurring question 'Who the F is Hank?'. — 00:02:13 > «Hank is a tiny yellow songbird said to represent the soul of France.»
  • John imagines the time machine's buyer going back and killing him before he rescues the evil babies. — 00:03:11 > «I would be both alive and dead, and evil baby Hitler would live both in 19th century Austria and in 21st century Tibet.»

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