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The STUPIDEST NEWS STORIES of 2009 (a song)

2009-12-30 · song · Hank · 4:00 · watch on YouTube

Topic: US politics & society · mode: Comedy & performance · tags: song or performance, guest or collab, timely hook, recurring series, self promotion

In his last video of 2009, Hank performs a song he wrote with music by Rhett and Link, mocking cable news for chasing celebrity scandals and hoaxes while important 2009 events went underplayed; he then plugs Rhett and Link and thanks John and Nerdfighteria.

What is said

The parts of the video and what is said in each (★ — how much it matters to the video).

00:00:00 — Last video of 2009 falls on Song Wednesday; Hank wrote the lyrics, Rhett and Link wrote the music, recorded together

  • ★★ Hank says his last video of 2009 falls on a Song Wednesday; he wrote the lyrics, sent them to Rhett and Link, who wrote the music, and they recorded it together. — 00:00:04 · Song Wednesday

00:00:27 — The song: 2009's stupidest news stories (Georgia flood vs Kanye/Swift, Palin, swine flu, Phelps, Tiger Woods and Letterman, Susan Boyle, teabaggers, Balloon Boy) vs the important events; comic New Year sign-off to Hank and 'Don'

  • ★★ The song says a Georgia flood left thousands homeless and seven dead, while the news was about Kanye West and Taylor Swift. (playful) — 00:00:27
  • ★★ The song says the news media fail by sending a dozen camera crews whenever Sarah Palin is mentioned, though she is not news. (playful) — 00:00:36
  • ★★★ The song says swine flu, killing 4,000 people, got more attention than it needed, while ordinary flu kills 60,000 a year unheeded; people like something to freak out about. (playful) — 00:00:48
  • ★★ The song says the media flew off the handle over one picture in the Michael Phelps marijuana scandal, though he did what the last three presidents did; priorities make little sense. (playful, hedged) — 00:00:59

  • ★★★ The song's refrain: many important things happened in 2009 (Iran's election, the recession, Obama's inauguration), yet what cable news covered seemed dumb. (playful) — 00:01:09 · sensationalism, Barack Obama

    “But to us the things on cable news seem so freaking dumb.”

  • ★★ The song says the Tiger Woods and David Letterman scandals were crappy news: rich men cheating on their wives is nothing new. (playful, hedged) — 00:01:33

  • ★★ The song says one of the year's biggest stories was that Susan Boyle could sing, reminding a public used to autotuned pretty people that talent needn't be hot. (playful) — 00:01:43
  • ★ The song mocks a protester proudly holding a sign calling himself a Teabagger and says, whatever the revolution means, the news was an illusion. (joke, hedged) — 00:01:54
  • ★★ The song calls the Balloon Boy story, with Falcon not in the balloon, the year's biggest load of poo. (playful, hedged) — 00:02:28
  • ★★ The song says 2009 was another year where we kept the world alive without paying attention; since the news still reports these stories, its singers just might be alone in their view. (playful, hedged) — 00:02:33 · sensationalism

00:03:27 — Plug: subscribe to Rhett and Link, their album out January 5th; thanks to John and Nerdfighteria for 2009; DFTBA

  • ★★ Hank tells viewers to check out Rhett and Link's work and subscribe to them to thank them for making his final Song Wednesday video awesome. — 00:03:27 · Song Wednesday
  • ★ Hank announces Rhett and Link have an album coming out on January 5th. — 00:03:41
  • ★★ Hank thanks John and Nerdfighteria for making 2009 an amazing year, more than he expected, and hopes 2010 can be even better. (hedged) — 00:03:45 · John Green, Nerdfighteria

Humor (dominant)

  • The song complains that the media obsess over Sarah Palin. — 00:00:41

    “they dispatch a dozen camera crews every time she poos”

  • On the Tiger Woods and David Letterman scandals: it turns out that rich guys cheat on their wives. — 00:01:38

    “That wasn't news in the year 25.”

  • The song laughs at a protester with a sign. — 00:01:56

    “proudly holding up a sign proclaiming he's a Teabagger.”

  • Rhett and Link wish Hank a happy New Year and then his brother, whose name they can't recall. — 00:03:19

    “I think his name is Don...”

Threads in this video

Mentioned

Central: Rhett and Link

Also: People: Barack Obama · David Letterman · Kanye West · Michael Phelps · Sarah Palin · Susan Boyle · Taylor Swift · Tiger Woods

Works: Britain's Got Talent (“the talent Britain's got”)

Organizations: Tea Party movement (“Teabagger”)

Rituals: Song Wednesday

Concepts: Influenza · sensationalism

Places: Georgia (U.S. state)

Events: 2009 Iranian presidential election · 2009 Southeastern United States floods · 2009 swine flu pandemic · Balloon boy hoax · First inauguration of Barack Obama · Great Recession

Products: Auto-Tune

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