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WRONG WRONG WRONG

2010-02-17 · list · Hank, John · 3:57 · watch on YouTube

Topic: Internet & YouTube (also: Nerdfighteria, Personal life, History & curiosities, Science & nature) · mode: Comedy & performance · tags: song or performance, community lore, guest or collab

Prodded by Hank Sock, Hank lists five ways John's welcome-back video was wrong: Hank had high-school girlfriends, Einstein did say many fine things, the true top internet sin is the high-angle selfie, and he knows both quarks and Amanda Bynes; the fifth point collapses when John phones in to say Bynes deleted her tweets.

What is said

The parts of the video and what is said in each (★ — how much it matters to the video).

00:00:00 — Welcome back, John; Hank Sock insists John was wrong on five points and must be held accountable

  • ★★ Hank Sock tells Hank that John's video was wrong on five major points and that, back after three weeks, John must be held accountable. (playful) — 00:00:07 · John Green

00:00:25 — Point 1: Hank did have girlfriends in high school

  • ★★ Hank rebuts John: he did have girlfriends in high school, naming four, all but one of whom would call him their boyfriend. (playful) — 00:00:25 · John Green

00:00:55 — Point 2: Einstein was a quotation generation machine after all (Truman letter, mathematics letter)

  • ★★★ Hank corrects John: Einstein didn't say many things attributed to him, but he was still a quotation generation machine who said many beautiful things. (hedged) — 00:00:55

    “…was kind of a quotation generation machine.”

  • ★★ Hank cites Einstein writing to Harry S. Truman that World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones, and telling a friend his own mathematics difficulties are greater. — 00:01:03

00:01:20 — Point 3: the most common internet sin is the high-angle self-portrait

00:01:40 — Point 4: Hank knows both quarks and Amanda Bynes (Hairspray); short song about quarks and Amanda Bynes

  • ★★ Hank says he knows the six types of quarks and also who Amanda Bynes is, from Hairspray, which he has seen about five times: physics knowledge doesn't exclude pop culture. (playful) — 00:01:40
  • ★★ Hank sings a short song (lyrics partly unclear) naming the quark types, saying quarks make up everything we can see whether or not you know what they are, and praising Amanda Bynes. (playful) — 00:02:09

00:02:34 — Point 5: Bynes's tweets are gone; John phones in to say she wrote and deleted them; John embarrassed her into deleting them

  • ★★★ John, phoning in, says Amanda Bynes did write the tweets and apparently deleted them afterwards. (playful, hedged) — 00:02:44 · Twitter
  • ★★ Hank concludes that John embarrassed Amanda Bynes into deleting her tweets, and that the internet is so weird. (playful) — 00:03:09 · John Green

00:03:16 — Apology to Amanda Bynes; asks to leave her best wishes and to misquote John and Hank in comments; sign-off

  • ★★ Hank apologizes to Amanda Bynes, says they are fans, and says misquoting Einstein saying something lovely is fine; Einstein likely doesn't care because he's dead. (hedged) — 00:03:16
  • ★★ Hank asks viewers to leave Amanda Bynes their best wishes in the comments. — 00:03:34
  • ★★ Hank asks viewers to misquote John and him in the comments, attributing quotes they never said, which they might then say. (playful, hedged) — 00:03:42 · John Green, Hank Green

Humor (significant)

  • Hank says one of his high-school girlfriends thought relationship labels were arbitrary. — 00:00:41

    “I think she also thought that monogamy was arbitrary.”

  • Hank names the true most common internet sin while holding the camera high above his face. — 00:01:26

    “you think that people will think you're more beautiful if you have a giant head.”

  • John phones just as Hank claims Bynes never tweeted; Hank asks how John knew what he was saying. — 00:02:46

    “I don't know esp.”

  • Hank mourns the witty line he can no longer use now that the tweets are gone. — 00:03:00

    “talk about how John put words about putting words in her mouth in her mouth.”

Threads in this video

Mentioned

Central: Albert Einstein · Amanda Bynes · Hank Sock · Hank's quark and Amanda Bynes song

Also: Chatroulette · Hairspray (2007 film) · Harry S. Truman · quark · Twitter

Only in the description or credits: Wikiquote

Also centred on Albert Einstein: Hello Baby!!

Also centred on Amanda Bynes: Hello Baby!!

Also centred on Hank Sock: Five Parts · Fake Movie Talk With A Sock

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