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cars vs. covid

2022-08-16 · letter vlog · John · 4:00 · watch on YouTube

Topic: Internet & YouTube · mode: Comedy & performance

Sick with COVID, John plays 'America's leading COVID-stricken Cars vs. influencer and analyst', reacting to Cars vs. videos with jokes about his fears, a misspoken line he prefers to his most famous one, a pun in progress and his adult cowardice.

What is said

The parts of the video and what is said in each (★ — how much it matters to the video).

00:00:00 — Greetings from COVID; John as America's leading COVID-stricken Cars vs. analyst; the sewage car

  • ★★★ John reports that he has COVID, opening his video with greetings from it. — 00:00:00 · COVID-19 pandemic
  • ★★ John styles himself America's leading COVID-stricken Cars vs. influencer and analyst. (playful) — 00:00:00 · Cars vs., COVID-19 pandemic
  • ★ John says one of his biggest fears is being unexpectedly drenched in raw sewage, which one car looked like it carried. — 00:00:00

00:00:27 — 'The smartest car in the squid' outdoes John's most famous line

  • ★★ John says his misspoken 'the smartest car in the squid' beats the most famous line he ever wrote, about falling in love slowly and then all at once, which he still likes. (playful) — 00:00:27 · The Fault in Our Stars

00:01:10 — Giant bulge, spinny rides, a pun in progress, and Cars vs. Giant Ramp to save the human race

  • ★ John says he would drive around the giant bulge; the urge to conquer it feels like toxic masculinity to him. (playful) — 00:01:10
  • ★ John says he does not enjoy spinny rides, such as the teacups at Disney World. — 00:01:32
  • ★ John tries out a pun motto, 'if it rides, I lives', and blames his foggy brain for not finishing it. (playful) — 00:01:32
  • ★★ If he had to do Cars vs. Giant Ramp to save the human race, John says second-grade him would want to be the hero, but adult him is cowardly and would seek a volunteer. (hypothetical) — 00:02:30 · Cars vs.

00:03:01 — An imagined cocktail-party TikToker who simulates trains versus giant pits; the most fun in days

  • ★ John imagines meeting a TikToker at a cocktail party who simulates trains versus giant pits and has learned that it is bad for trains. (playful) — 00:03:01 · TikTok
  • ★★ John says this is the most fun he has had in at least three days. (playful) — 00:03:56

In the description and comments

Humor (dominant)

  • Having said 'squid' for 'squad', John compares the slip with his most famous written line. — 00:00:27

    “it's not nearly as good as the smartest car in the squid”

  • Imagining surviving a car flipped by the giant bulge in the road, John pictures the aftermath. — 00:01:10

    “I would probably call my therapist and be like, you'll never guess what was in the road. It was a giant bulge.”

  • John tries to coin a motto about spinny rides and fails mid-sentence. — 00:01:32

    “i'm working on a pun okay”

  • Faced with a Cars vs. Giant Ramp to save humanity, John's second-grade self wants to be a hero. — 00:02:30

    “But the problem is that adult me is pretty cowardly.”

Threads in this video

Where the stories that moved here went next

Mentioned

Central: Cars vs. · COVID-19 pandemic

Also: Deep Impact · sewage · The Fault in Our Stars · TikTok · Walt Disney World

Only in the description or credits: Thoughts from Places

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