Cooking with a 3-Year-Old: Slobber Carrots and Gross Barbecue

2013-12-10 · challenge / punishment · John, Henry Green, Sarah Urist Green · 3:59 · watch on YouTube

Topic: Nerdfighteria · mode: Comedy & performance · tags: punishment or challenge, community lore, guest or collab, recurring series

John performs his punishment by cooking and eating the meal his son Henry designed: slobber carrots with drool, gross barbecue of Valu Time luncheon loaf with drool, and a cabbage hat; he finds the carrots fine and the barbecue terrible.

What is said

The parts of the video and what is said in each (★ — how much it matters to the video).

00:00:00 — 'Punishment Tuesday': Henry recites the menu; whose drool; what slobber carrots and barbecue are

• ★★★ On 'punishment Tuesday' John reminds Henry he came up with the gross meal: slobber carrots with drool, gross barbecue with drool, and hat. — 00:00:00 · Henry Green, Punishment
• ★ Henry Green: Henry explains that slobber carrots are cooked carrots and agrees that barbecue is basically meat and barbecue sauce. — 00:00:21 · Henry Green

00:00:36 — Cooking: Valu Time luncheon loaf, oven at 425, salt, drool on the carrots, frying the loaf, cabbage hat

• ★ John reads that the first ingredient of Valu Time Luncheon Loaf is mechanically separated chicken and pork and the last is smoke flavoring. (playful) — 00:01:37

00:02:31 — Plating with barbecue sauce and drool; John eats the carrots, the barbecue and the hat

• ★★ Tasting: the slobber carrots with drool are actually quite good, the gross barbecue is so bad, much worse than a blenderized Happy Meal, and the hat is not very good. (playful) — 00:03:08

00:03:49 — That was the punishment meal, not recommended, 'the grossest meal ever'; sign-off

• ★★ John concludes that was his punishment meal, doesn't recommend it, and quotes Henry: the grossest meal ever. — 00:03:51 · Punishment, Henry Green

In the description and comments

• ★★ In the description John is glad to have the punishment behind him and thanks Henry and Nerdfighteria for the horror. — video description · Punishment, Nerdfighteria, Henry Green
• ★★ The description says the Project for Awesome starts in one week and points makers to P4A thumbnails. — video description · Project for Awesome

Humor (dominant)

• Henry insists the drool on John's meal must be Henry's, not John's; John says he would prefer his own. — 00:00:20

  “My drool's already in my mouth.”

• Looking at the cheap Valu Time luncheon loaf label. — 00:00:44

  “They're so focused on value they didn't even spend the money to print the "e" in value!”

• John tastes the slobber carrots Henry has drooled on and finds them good. — 00:03:14

  “If anything, the drool adds something.”

• After gagging on the gross barbecue of luncheon loaf, John compares it with the blenderized Happy Meal he once ate on air. — 00:03:37

  “So much worse than a blenderized Happy Meal.”

Threads in this video

• performed · John: punishment for his over-four-minute health-insurance video, ruled not educational by Our Pants (2013) — John cooks and eats the punishment meal Henry designed: slobber carrots with drool, gross barbecue with drool, and a cabbage hat. (00:03:51)
• callback · John's 'Cooking with John' show: making and eating disgusting things (2007) — John says the gross barbecue is so much worse than a blenderized Happy Meal, recalling his earlier blend-and-eat cooking show. (00:03:37)
• reminder · Hank asks people to make and submit P4A 2013 videos promoting their favorite charities (2013) — The description says P4A starts in one week and points video makers to the P4A thumbnails. (video description)

Mentioned

Central: Henry Green · Punishment · Valu Time Luncheon Loaf

Also: Happy Meal · Sarah Urist Green

Only in the description or credits: Project for Awesome

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