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Destroying My Router with a Hammer (and etc.)

2018-06-01 · letter vlog · Hank · 3:08 · watch on YouTube

Topic: Economics (also: Nerdfighteria, Internet & YouTube, Everyday life) · mode: Comedy & performance · tags: self promotion

Thanking John for his pea video, Hank googles odd images, then argues that Google destroyed the value of his spare Wi-Fi router by offering no discounted two-pack, but that the people who made it deserve honor, so he will sell it rather than smash it; he smashes his old 2012 router instead.

What is said

The parts of the video and what is said in each (★ — how much it matters to the video).

00:00:00 — Thanks for John's pea video; posts on the Nerdfighteria subreddit

  • ★★ Hank thanks John for his pea video: his main problem with it is that it is very difficult to live up to, a beautiful thing. (playful) — 00:00:02 · John Green
  • ★★ Hank says folks on the Nerdfighteria subreddit have been having a good time, and shows several of their posts. — 00:00:07 · Nerdfighteria, Reddit

00:00:17 — Googling odd images on the spot: cat on a horse, owl with a hat, Christmas ferret

  • ★★ One of Hank's favorite things about being alive now is that he can Google pretty much anything and it is there. — 00:00:17 · Google
  • ★ Hank names images to search for (a cat on a horse, an owl with a hat, a dog on a bunny, a Christmas ferret) without looking first, adding the first result after filming. (playful) — 00:00:21

00:00:45 — The spare Google Wifi router: no discounted two-pack, the urge to smash it, and honoring the work inside it

  • ★★ Hank recently switched his house over to Google Wifi, which he finds really well done. — 00:00:45 · Google
  • ★★ Hank says Google Wifi units are sold either singly or three for the price of two. — 00:00:49 · Google
  • ★★ Needing only two, Hank ended up with an extra router, a $100-plus device he is a little mad about, which would just sit in a closet until obsolete enough to recycle at Staples. — 00:00:54
  • ★★ In a head-banging song Hank concludes he should sell the router on Craigslist because somebody wants it; hitting it with a hammer would make it garbage. (playful) — 00:01:25
  • ★★★ Hank says Google mostly destroyed the router's economic value by not offering him a discounted two-pack. — 00:01:34 · Google
  • ★★★ But people worked hard to make the router; there is still value inside it, and Hank should honor their hard work. — 00:01:37
  • ★★ Hank admits he wants to see inside the router, of which there were no pictures online, and feels he made a pact with viewers: he bought a hammer for five dollars and set up dramatic lighting. (playful) — 00:01:45

00:01:55 — The hammer, the upside-down title, smashing the old 2012 router; Craigslist not worth it

  • ★★ On-screen text says An Absolutely Remarkable Thing is available for preorder and comes out September 25. — 00:02:02 · An Absolutely Remarkable Thing
  • ★★ Instead Hank smashes the old 2012 router his Google system replaces, a 'P.O.S.' whose cords keep pulling it over; he filmed the intro before smashing it. (playful) — 00:02:08 · Google
  • ★ Hank says routers like his old one go for about 20 dollars on Amazon. — 00:02:30 · Amazon
  • ★★ At that price it isn't worth listing on Craigslist and having somebody weird come to his house; nobody can compete with Amazon's convenience. (playful) — 00:02:30 · Amazon

00:02:40 — DFTBA.com: McElroy merch, The Baby-Sitters Club Club, the pea shirt; sign-off and donut outtake

  • ★★ Hank says DFTBA.com now sells McElroy merch and merch for The Baby-Sitters Club Club, which he calls the best of the Baby-Sitters Club podcasts. — 00:02:42 · DFTBA Records
  • ★★ Hank shows the pea shirt sold at DFTBA.com. — 00:02:50 · DFTBA Records
  • ★ In an outtake Hank says he won't eat the whole rusty-hammer donut: he is a 38-year-old man. (playful) — 00:03:01

In the description and comments

  • ★★ The description says the video is a mess; Hank flips upside down because he forgot that titles now appear under videos on YouTube. — video description · YouTube
  • ★★ The description thanks Google for making really great Wi-Fi routers but demands the discounted two-pack. (playful) — video description · Google

Humor (significant)

  • Hank googles odd images and promises to show whatever comes up first. — 00:00:40

    “Just throwing the first result on here, no matter what it is.”

  • To head-banging music Hank sings his decision about the spare router. — 00:01:25

    “Gotta sell it on Craigslist”

  • Selling a 20-dollar router on Craigslist would mean strangers at his house. — 00:02:35

    “Have somebody weird come to my house and get a router. Meet me in the Target parking lot.”

  • In an outtake Hank declines to finish the donut. — 00:03:01

    “I'm a 38 year old man.”

Threads in this video

Mentioned

Central: Google Wifi

Also: Projects: DFTBA Records

Works: An Absolutely Remarkable Thing · Pea Shirt · The Baby-Sitters Club Club

Organizations: Amazon · Craigslist · Google · Reddit · Staples Inc. · Target Corporation

Concepts: recycling

Only in the description or credits: McElroy brothers · Rob Scallon · YouTube

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