Skip to content

Four Years Ago

2020-10-30 · letter vlog · Hank · 3:52 · watch on YouTube

Topic: US politics & society (also: Personal life) · mode: Personal essay · tags: timely hook

On Orin's fourth birthday, days before the 2020 election, Hank reads his Google searches from the day Orin was born, just before the 2016 election: swaddling, head-size worries, Trump and Huma Abedin's laptop; he concludes that worry under little data is often misplaced, that the election will not end the pandemic, inequality or hyper-partisanship, and asks everyone to keep worrying for each other.

What is said

The parts of the video and what is said in each (★ — how much it matters to the video).

00:00:00 — Four years since Orin's birth; the Google search history of that day: swaddling, head size worries and their lesson, odd searches

  • ★★★ Four years ago today Hank was in the hospital, tired, a little anxious and very happy to have a healthy baby boy and a healthy wife who was now a mom. — 00:00:00 · Orin Green
  • ★★ Hank says photos and videos of that time don't tell the whole story; his Google search history from that day tells a more true and more personal, if creepy, one. — 00:00:00 · Google
  • ★★ That day Hank watched many YouTube videos on how to swaddle a newborn and googled the etymology of 'swaddle'. — 00:00:29 · YouTube
  • ★★ Orin was around the 90th percentile in weight but 50th in head circumference, which worried Hank into much googling; within three days his head, squished by birth, was normal. — 00:00:29 · Orin Green
  • ★★★ Hank's lesson: the things he worries about most when they are new and he has the least data are often the least worth worrying about. — 00:00:58
  • ★ Hank has no idea why he googled 'gay culture otter' when his son was less than a day old; maybe boredom while everyone else slept. (playful) — 00:00:58

00:01:27 — Searches about the 2016 election, Trump and Huma Abedin's laptop: the story was our anxiety; cute and useful searches; searching 'Orin'

  • ★★ His son was born in the days before the 2016 election, which Hank was very worried about, so many searches are about Donald Trump. — 00:01:27 · United States presidential election, Donald Trump
  • ★★ Hank also searched about Huma Abedin's laptop, a story about Hillary Clinton's assistant that felt very big then and that he no longer remembers. — 00:01:27
  • ★★★ Like Orin's head size, the laptop story had little data: the story was really our anxiety, and worry about the worry was legitimate, since it could lead people to faulty judgments lived with for years. — 00:01:56 · Orin Green
  • ★★ Among the useful searches, Hank asked how to know when a baby is done pooping, because he took the diaper off before Orin was done. (playful) — 00:01:56 · Orin Green

00:02:36 — Not knowing how to be a perfect dad or good human; worry for each other; the election will not end the pandemic, injustice or hyper-partisanship

  • ★★ One search was simply 'Orin', Katherine's granddad's name: they had not yet named their son and were searching baby names. — 00:02:36 · Orin Green, Katherine Green
  • ★★ Hank doesn't want to have been thinking about Trump that day, but was, and doesn't know whether he should have been. (unsure) — 00:02:36 · Donald Trump
  • ★★ Hank didn't know how to be a perfect dad after a day, doesn't know how to be a good human after 40 years, and struggles to engage with a world changed so much in four years. — 00:02:36
  • ★★★ Hank says the world is better for having his son in it, and better for having his worry in it: worry for his son's and everyone else's health and happiness. — 00:03:05 · Orin Green
  • ★★ Hank says he looked up these searches because he doesn't know how to handle this moment; this will be a rough weekend for him. — 00:03:05
  • ★★★ Hank is very worried about the election, but says it will not end the pandemic, injustice and inequality, conspiracy theory, hyper-partisanship, or people's fear, anxiety and anger. — 00:03:05 · United States presidential election, COVID-19 pandemic
  • ★★ Hank asks everyone at least to keep worrying for each other, and occasionally to google the 'free shavacado' Vine. (playful) — 00:03:34

Threads in this video

Where the stories that moved here went next

Mentioned

Central: Orin Green · Worry

Also: People: Donald Trump · Hillary Clinton · Huma Abedin · Katherine Green

Organizations: Google · Vine · YouTube

Concepts: conspiracy theory · parenting · political polarization

Events: COVID-19 pandemic · United States presidential election

Also centred on Worry: Why I'm Worried about 2020 · I am Grateful for My Worry

← Previous: The time I met Joe Biden · Next → Alaska for Looking