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How to Make Guys Like You

2009-02-24 · Q&A · John · 3:13 · watch on YouTube

Topic: Everyday life · mode: Advice & reviews · tags: recurring series, community lore

On a one-question Question Tuesday, John answers a 15-year-old girl's question about getting boys to like her with six mostly comic 'ways', arguing against cultural constructions that cast young women as stupid and eyelid-fluttery and recommending nerd boys (and, to boys, nerd girls).

What is said

The parts of the video and what is said in each (★ — how much it matters to the video).

00:00:00 — Greeting; Question Tuesday with just one question, an emailed question from a 15-year-old girl: how do I get boys to like me?

  • ★★ John devotes Question Tuesday to a single question, emailed by a 15-year-old girl who is not very popular: how does she get boys to like her? — 00:00:00 · Question Tuesday, Nerdfighteria

00:00:23 — John is no expert; videos watched mostly by women except giraffe-sex ones; ways 1-3: become a giraffe, become World of Warcraft, be 'hot' (two definitions of hot)

  • ★★ John says all their videos except those with giraffe sex as the thumbnail are watched by nearly three times more women than men. (playful) — 00:00:34 · Vlogbrothers
  • ★★ John says there are about six ways to get 15-year-old boys to like you: become a giraffe, become World of Warcraft, be 'hot', be yourself, act like an idiot, consider different boys. (playful, hedged) — 00:00:52
  • ★★★ John distinguishes the normal human meaning of 'hot' (suitable for mating) from a culturally constructed one (malnourished, breast implants) and says nothing about the latter is inherently hot. (playful, hedged) — 00:01:00 · social construction

00:01:35 — Ways 4-5: 'be yourself'; acting like an idiot to meet cultural expectations (E. E. Cummings' eyelid flutter); everyone feels stupid and awkward

  • ★★ John says adults are obliged to advise 'be yourself' though it doesn't work, since no one knows what being yourself means. (playful) — 00:01:35
  • ★★★ Citing an E. E. Cummings poem, John asks why women's eyelids always flutter while men's brains work, and criticizes cultural constructions that young women should be stupid, awkward and eyelid-fluttery. — 00:01:50
  • ★★★ John says boys secretly feel stupid, awkward and eyelid-fluttery too; once you realize all brains gesture and everybody feels awkward, boys will like you. (playful) — 00:02:20

00:02:37 — Way 6: consider different boys - nerd boys; to boys: nerd girls are an underutilized romantic resource

  • ★★★ John advises Katie to consider nerd boys: they don't sparkle, but they are sensitive, caring and sweet, if a little needy. (playful) — 00:02:37

  • ★★★ John tells boys that nerd girls are the world's greatest underutilized romantic resource, and that denying they are hot is a Paris Hilton-esque failure to understand hotness. (playful) — 00:02:52

    “nerd girls are the world's greatest underutilized romantic resource”

00:03:05 — Sign-off; excited for Song Wednesday, little dance

  • ★ John says he is so excited for Song Wednesday that he has to do a little dance. (playful) — 00:03:05 · Song Wednesday

Humor (significant)

  • Since only giraffe-sex videos draw more men than women, John's first advice for getting boys to like you. — 00:00:43

    “you should become a giraffe.”

  • John imagines asking an 18th-century boy whether he'd marry a woman with plastic bags inserted into her breasts. — 00:01:23

    “"What's plastic?"”

  • John is contractually obligated to advise 'be yourself', though no one knows what it means. — 00:01:42

    “Like, whose self would I otherwise be being?”

  • Once you realize all brains gesture and everyone feels awkward, boys will like you, John explains why. — 00:02:29

    “boys will like you because we will be scared of your knowledge”

Threads in this video

Where the stories that moved here went next

Mentioned

Central: gender role · nerd

Also: People: E. E. Cummings · Paris Hilton

Works: since feeling is first · Twilight · World of Warcraft

Organizations: YouTube

Rituals: Question Tuesday · Song Wednesday

Concepts: giraffe · social construction

Also centred on gender role: September 18: In Defense of Chris Crocker

Also centred on nerd: Brotherhood 2.0: June 20: Moving · July 27: How Nerdfighters Drop Insults · October 24th: RANDOM NERDFIGHTING · Harry Potter Nerds Win at Life · Thoughts from Comic-Con (NO MORE CHEETO MEDIA!)

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