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This Video Makes No Sense

2015-04-10 (said on 2015-04-11 — implied: date said in the video; uploaded -1 days later) · other · Hank · 3:58 · watch on YouTube

Topic: Projects (also: Personal life, Pop culture, Science & nature, History & curiosities, Everyday life) · mode: Comedy & performance · tags: song or performance, on location

A deliberately disjointed Hank video: he hits back at John's mockery of his haircut by attacking John's blank background, then strings together an improv song game, caterpillar memory, an office tour, presidents who killed people and a Snapchat recipe.

What is said

The parts of the video and what is said in each (★ — how much it matters to the video).

00:00:00 — Greeting; comeback to John's haircut mockery: the composition of John's background, a blank wall; Neverending Story riff

  • ★★ Hank notes that John recently made fun of his new hairstyle, which is fine because that's what brothers do. (playful) — 00:00:01 · John Green
  • ★★ Coming back at John, Hank mocks the composition of John's video background after eight years of vlogging: objects nicely placed on one side of the wall, then nothing. (playful) — 00:00:05 · John Green

00:00:29 — The improv game 'That's Not My Name' from friends' drunk board-game channel; Hank sings his own versions

  • ★★ Hank recommends 'That's Not My Name', an improv game from friends' drunk board-game YouTube channel: go round a circle singing the song with new names; he and Katherine play it all the time. — 00:00:32 · Katherine Green

00:01:10 — Caterpillars dissolve into goop in the cocoon, and butterflies keep fears learned as caterpillars

  • ★★ Hank says caterpillars do not just get modified into butterflies: inside the cocoon they turn into a liquid, soupy organic goop and then reform entirely. — 00:01:10
  • ★★ Hank says caterpillars can be taught to fear smells, and after turning into goop and then butterflies, the butterflies remain afraid of those smells. — 00:01:23

00:01:31 — Tour of Hank's offices: staff, an office animal moved to another tank, the Crash Course studio upstairs, SciShow, VidCon

  • ★ Hank gives a quick tour of his offices: staff at work, Callie Awesomesauce moved to a different tank for being 'a murderer', the Crash Course studio (now upstairs), SciShow and VidCon. (playful) — 00:01:31 · Crash Course, SciShow, VidCon

00:02:37 — Putin, and the two US presidents who definitely killed people outside combat: Andrew Jackson and Grover Cleveland

  • ★★ Hank thinks Vladimir Putin has probably not just ordered people to be killed but physically killed people himself. (hedged) — 00:02:38
  • ★★ Hank says many US presidents have killed people, mostly in combat, but only two definitely killed people outside combat. — 00:02:52
  • ★★ Hank says Andrew Jackson killed a man in a duel, but only after the man shot him in the chest, leaving a bullet near his heart for the rest of his life. — 00:02:59
  • ★★ Hank says Grover Cleveland, as sheriff of Erie County, personally carried out two executions of murderers, though he could have paid a deputy ten dollars apiece to do it. — 00:03:07

00:03:18 — 'That's not my name' reprise; Hank thinks his hair looks good, John should get a new poster; sign-off

  • ★★ Hank tells John he thinks his hair looks good, and that John should get a new poster. (playful, hedged) — 00:03:25 · John Green

00:03:30 — Snapchat recipe: roasting butternut squash

  • ★ In a Snapchat recipe, Hank cuts and scoops butternut squash, salts it, remembers too late to preheat the oven, and bakes it for about 45 minutes. (playful) — 00:03:30

Humor (significant)

  • Hank describes John's background: objects nicely placed on one side of the wall and then nothing. — 00:00:20

    “Blank space, baby.”

  • On the office tour Hank introduces Callie Awesomesauce, an animal that had to be moved to its own tank. — 00:01:39

    “he needed to go in a different tank 'cause he's a murderer.”

  • After explaining that Grover Cleveland personally hanged two murderers as sheriff, Hank addresses him. — 00:03:16

    “Grover Cleveland, very Ned Stark of you.”

  • Hank ends his Snapchat squash recipe by addressing the vegetable. — 00:03:54

    “Thank you, butternut squash, for your life, and I'm going to consume your flesh.”

Threads in this video

Where the stories that moved here went next

Mentioned

Central: Andrew Jackson · Grover Cleveland · metamorphosis · That's Not My Name (“They call me Brian, they call me Nargle, the call me Amber, they call me Jeff”)

Also: People: Blake (staff, mentioned from 2012) · Katherine Green · Nicolas Cage · Vladimir Putin

Projects: Crash Course · SciShow · VidCon

Works: Beer & Board Games · Blank Space (“Blank space, baby.”) · The Neverending Story (film) (“Artax is dead and you need to name the childlike empress”)

Organizations: Snapchat

Concepts: capital punishment

Places: Erie County, New York

Characters: Ned Stark

animal: Callie Awesomesauce

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