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So, About This HAIR…

2023-06-16 · letter vlog · Hank · 4:09 · watch on YouTube

Topic: Philosophy & meaning (also: Personal life) · mode: Personal essay

Hank revisits his old line that you have no obligation to your former self: since he is a story he tells himself, he loves his punk 17-year-old self, who wanted a mohawk at 40, and now chooses to honor him, keeping the amount of obligation he wants.

What is said

The parts of the video and what is said in each (★ — how much it matters to the video).

00:00:00 — 'No obligation to your former self' and its nuance: the self is a story we tell ourselves

  • ★★ Almost ten years ago, wearing a lanyard on stage, Hank told a roomful of people that you have no obligation to your former self, which he still thinks is true. — 00:00:00

    “You have no obligation to your former self.”

  • ★★ Hank's reasoning: the one person he is objectively smarter than is himself four years ago, who knew less and had fewer experiences, and who does not exist. (playful) — 00:00:00

  • ★★★ With ten more years of wisdom Hank adds nuance: he is also just a story he tells himself about himself, which makes having no obligation to his former self tricky. — 00:00:26

00:00:53 — How easy it is to lose connections to past, communities and families; felt obligation lower than 50 years ago

  • ★★★ Hank thinks it is too easy these days to lose connections to our past, friends, communities, families, places, nations, religions and histories. — 00:00:53
  • ★★ Hank says it is probably true that those connections are arbitrary: we just happened into them. (hedged) — 00:00:53
  • ★★ Hank says easier things than feeling connected compete (TikTok, smartphone games, work to pay the bills), and investments in connection are harder partly because they are not necessary. — 00:01:22 · TikTok
  • ★★ Hank says felt obligation differs between people, but the obligation we feel to former selves, communities and families is on average lower for society than 50 years ago. — 00:01:22

00:02:02 — Teenage punk Hank and his wish to get a mohawk at 40

  • ★★ In high school Hank thought of himself as a bit of a punk, listened to the Dead Milkmen, Rancid, Operation Ivy and The Clash, and did not want a normal life as a businessman or lawyer. — 00:02:02
  • ★★★ Hank often thought he wanted a mohawk at 40, to prove he had a job that allowed one: 17-year-old Hank's version of a cool life, which he now calls silly. — 00:02:02
  • ★★ Until quite recently Hank had a job where getting a mohawk would have made his job and his peers' jobs a little harder. — 00:02:26

00:03:05 — Loving former selves, honoring 17-year-old Hank this week, and choosing some obligation; sign-off

  • ★★★ Hank says he is a story he tells himself and 17-year-old Hank is a vital part of it: he is not him, but he loves and cares about him. — 00:03:05
  • ★★ Hank loves many people who no longer exist, because they died or changed: he still loves 20-year-old Katherine and also 43-year-old Katherine. — 00:03:05 · Katherine Green
  • ★★ Hank describes 17-year-old Hank as certain, passionate, scared, wild and often very kind: a good guy who became him. — 00:03:05
  • ★★★ Hank says this week (week of 12 June 2023) he was given an opportunity to honor his 17-year-old self, and here he is. — 00:03:52

  • ★★★ Hank concludes he does not have no obligation to his former self: he has the amount of obligation he wants, and he wants some. — 00:03:52

    “I have the amount of obligation to my former self that I want to have”

In the description and comments

  • ★★ The description says not all chemotherapy makes hair fall out but Hank's does, an opportunity to appreciate someone dumber than him who does not exist. — video description · chemotherapy
  • ★★ Hank writes the description from his chemo chair, feeling good: two weeks between treatments, the first pretty terrible, the second pretty normal. — video description · chemotherapy
  • ★★★ Hank writes it is too early to tell how well treatment is going, but early signs indicate his cancer cells are responding well, meaning dying a bunch. (hedged) — video description · cancer
  • ★ In a channel comment John, at Hank's order, says the Awesome Socks Club, with artist-designed socks and all profit to charity, is accepting new memberships, as happens only a couple of times a year. — creator comment · Awesome Socks Club

Threads in this video

Where the stories that moved here went next

Mentioned

Central: mohawk · Narrative identity

Also: Katherine Green · Operation Ivy · punk subculture · Rancid · The Clash · The Dead Milkmen · TikTok

Only in the description or credits: Awesome Socks Club · cancer · chemotherapy

Also centred on Narrative identity: When to Attack a Moose

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