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Best jokes of 2016

All 66 jokes rated strength 3 (the top of the 1–3 scale) in 2016 videos, in upload order: the setup (paraphrase), then the punchline as said, the kind of joke and who tells it.

Kinds this year: Absurd 36, Self-deprecation 9, Wordplay 13, Satire 6, Callback 1, Running bit 1.

← Humor overview · 2007 · 2008 · 2009 · 2010 · 2011 · 2012 · 2013 · 2014 · 2015 · 2016 · 2017 · 2018 · 2019 · 2020 · 2021 · 2022 · 2023 · 2024 · 2025 · 2026

2016-01

2016-02

2016-03

2016-04

  • John ends up accepting the AI's absurd trades out of guilt, and can't enjoy winning. → “you feel so sorry for the sad little Artificial Intelligence kitten.” — Absurd, John — What's Wrong with Monopoly? (2016-04-05, 00:01:17)
  • Hank tells a laughing guest he likes how dead their eyes are. → “I want all girlfriends to tell me that after dates.” — Absurd, Hank — 47 YouTubers Laugh Without Smiling (2016-04-08, 00:00:35)
  • A guest's laugh-without-smiling is too convincing. → “And I just, you know, make that noise and everyone believes it.” — Absurd, Hank — 47 YouTubers Laugh Without Smiling (2016-04-08, 00:01:41)
  • Listing life milestones he passed in his T-shirt-and-jeans uniform. → “and when I touched my first boob” — Absurd, Hank — T-Shirt and Jeans and TOUR ANNOUNCEMENT (2016-04-15, 00:00:53)

2016-05

  • John thought being the pace car driver was a purely ceremonial position. → “You know like running with the Olympic Torch or being the Prime Minister of Putin's Russia” — Satire, John — No Fumar (2016-05-03, 00:01:15)
  • The Spanish no-smoking announcement interrupts John's VidCon reminder. → “I know I can't fumar!” — Running bit, John — No Fumar (2016-05-03, 00:02:57)
  • Terrified by footsteps in the basement, Hank waits to see whether it is a monster or an employee; it is a musician practising. → “It's a saxophone monster.” — Absurd, Hank — I AM A GOLDEN GOD (2016-05-20, 00:01:37)
  • John recalls lecturing his grandmother that he was in Ulysses' 1904 Dublin and that nothing mattered less than the weather; after a moment she asks: → “"Well, is it raining, or isn't it?"” — Absurd, John — Easier Than IKEA: A Video in Two Parts (2016-05-24, 00:01:33)
  • John reaches the point in a commencement address where the speaker reassures graduates that adulthood isn't so bad. → “but no, no, it is so bad!” — Self-deprecation, John — Easier Than IKEA: A Video in Two Parts (2016-05-24, 00:01:57)
  • A man says they can't broadcast what The Thing is, so the visit must be filmed without revealing it. → “It'll just be a reaction video to The Thing.” — Absurd, Hank — Reaction Video: THE THING! (2016-05-27, 00:00:31)
  • John says he really needs to sleep on the plane to London, then reports back. → “I couldn't even vlog it, I was too busy sleeping it.” — Wordplay, John — The Most Amazing Day (2016-05-31, 00:01:23)

2016-06

  • Hank explains how he seems so knowledgeable on his educational channels. → “thanks to a teleprompter, I get to pretend that I know everything about the standard model and philosophy. but mostly I'm just reading.” — Self-deprecation, Hank — Hank Roasts Himself Diss Track - Roast Yourself Challenge (2016-06-10, 00:01:20)
  • Asked by Sports with John why he isn't watching the USMNT, Hank doesn't know what it is; a viewer has a guess. → “the USMNT is almost certainly the United States Mutant Ninja Turtles” — Wordplay, Hank — Questions (and Announcements) from VidCon (2016-06-24, 00:01:08)
  • Hank loves avocados and the multiverse, so he combines them. → “If the multiverse theory is true, there is a universe in which I am an avocado.” — Absurd, Hank — Questions (and Announcements) from VidCon (2016-06-24, 00:03:15)
  • The tour guide's script claims Iceland's weather is mild year-round. → “And then we got off the bus and that August afternoon it was perhaps half a degree above freezing.” — Satire, John — New Iceland (2016-06-28, 00:01:04)
  • Henry is assigned to physically move Iceland; John, not a scientist, thinks it can't be that hard. → “I figure we just get a big tugboat or something and pull it south!” — Absurd, John — New Iceland (2016-06-28, 00:02:28)

2016-07

  • Paper Towns is about a larger-than-life character who enjoys well-plotted escapes and lacks empathy → “so maybe he found it relatable?” — Absurd, John — El Chapo and Me (2016-07-26, 00:01:14)
  • John says his readers are still a relatively small club, Hank → “you, a few other people, EL CHAPO” — Absurd, John — El Chapo and Me (2016-07-26, 00:01:52)

2016-08

  • Midway through a list of real sports he wants in the Olympics, Hank slips in a non-sport. → “Number 5: Super dope secret handshakes.” — Absurd, Hank — 16 Sports that Should Be in the Olympics (2016-08-19, 00:01:50)
  • John admits he mostly wants Ultimate Frisbee on TV because dogs are good at it. → “Which makes it the sport most likely to inspire the new Air Bud sequel our dark and broken world so desperately needs.” — Absurd, John — The Ocho! Sports I Want on TV (2016-08-23, 00:02:18)
  • Showing off old things he's still into, Hank stuffs a Yeti into his mouth → “I got Yeti in my mouth.” — Absurd, Hank — I'm Just Going to Talk for Four Minutes (2016-08-26, 00:01:39)
  • Viewers have spent over 50 lifetimes watching Vlogbrothers videos → “We're just killing folks.” — Self-deprecation, Hank — I'm Just Going to Talk for Four Minutes (2016-08-26, 00:03:44)
  • The moral of his rib story: your body is a temple, don't fill it with Doritos → “do not fill it with beer on your 39th birthday, or else you will hurt yourself.” — Absurd, John — My Body Is a Broken Temple (2016-08-30, 00:02:13)

2016-09

2016-10

2016-11

  • Sabrina describes what her love of naps and self-hatred have left her with → “the only thing that keeps me warm at night is the dumpster fire that is my life” — Self-deprecation, Sabrina Cruz — Stress and Joy (2016-11-04, 00:00:06)
  • Sabrina on how stressed she is → “I would probably be crying myself to sleep if I was getting some sleep.” — Self-deprecation, Sabrina Cruz — Stress and Joy (2016-11-04, 00:00:45)
  • Sabrina realizes in her first math lecture that she cannot do math → “I have made a horrible miscalculation, probably because I don't know how to do math.” — Wordplay, Sabrina Cruz — Stress and Joy (2016-11-04, 00:01:55)
  • John on how he looks with this year's mustache → “I look like a 39-year-old man impersonating a nine-year-old impersonating a police officer.” — Self-deprecation, John — A PIZZAMAS MIRACLE (2016-11-08, 00:01:12)
  • John orders coffee while wearing his mustache → “I mustache you if you would like room for cream” — Wordplay, John — A PIZZAMAS MIRACLE (2016-11-08, 00:01:47)
  • Craig claims his earlier impression of John was well received and cites Roger Ebert saying two thumbs up → “several times throughout his career about other things.” — Absurd, Craig Benzine — Who the Eff Is Hank? (2016-11-14, 00:00:19)
  • Craig couldn't find the 300 BC horseman portrait, so imagines what it looked like → “By “horseman” I assume they meant “centaur.”” — Absurd, Craig Benzine — Who the Eff Is Hank? (2016-11-14, 00:02:21)
  • Asked how he responds to critics who call his novels pretentious, John simply concedes → “Yeah.” — Self-deprecation, John — Decathlons, Pretension, and the Weirdest Animal I've Met: It's Question Thursday (2016-11-17, 00:00:21)
  • Asked for the weirdest animal he has ever met → “Probably Maureen Johnson.” — Absurd, John — Decathlons, Pretension, and the Weirdest Animal I've Met: It's Question Thursday (2016-11-17, 00:00:43)
  • After Felicity scoots her itchy butt across the bed sheet, Lex forgets and sleeps on it; she clarifies she means the sheet → “But at this point, in terms of hygiene, there’s basically no difference.” — Self-deprecation, Lex Croucher — Are Pets Ethical? (2016-11-18, 00:00:31)
  • Nathan does an impression of Obama doing a bad Kanye impression, calling for Kim → “No, Michelle, jus- there's no Kim, it was just the video.” — Absurd, Nathan Zed — You're Not Good Enough (2016-11-25, 00:01:05)
  • Told his drawing looks good, small Nathan spirals into suspicion that the kid is lying and taunting him → “I- I- I have to kill him before he kills me.” — Absurd, Nathan Zed — You're Not Good Enough (2016-11-25, 00:02:31)
  • John explains Alice never pooped on him because he went in with about seven diapers → “I’d be wearing like a diaper suit of armor.” — Absurd, John — Baby Poop Rookie: Vlogbrothers Reunited (2016-11-29, 00:01:43)
  • John says he has thought a lot about which one book he'd take to a desert island; Hank asks if the point is to leave it there so no one could read it again → “Ayn Rand’s The Fountainhead.” — Satire, John — Baby Poop Rookie: Vlogbrothers Reunited (2016-11-29, 00:02:11)
  • Hank would take the Kingkiller trilogy though its last book isn't out; John says nice guy Pat Rothfuss would have a plane fly over and drop the third book when it comes out → “and just wave goodbye to you.” — Absurd, John — Baby Poop Rookie: Vlogbrothers Reunited (2016-11-29, 00:02:52)

2016-12